noizys blog
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Gegenüber von Afrika

Heimat haben ist gut,
Süß der Schlummer unter eigenem Dach,
Kinder, Garten und Hund. Aber ach,
Kaum hast du vom letzten Wandern geruht,
Geht dir die Ferne mit neuer Verlockung nach.
Besser ist Heimweh leiden
Und unter den hohen Sternen allein
Mit seiner Sehnsucht sein.
Haben und rasten kann nur der,
Dessen Herz gelassen schlägt,
Während der Wandrer Mühsal und Reisebeschwer
In immer getäuschter Hoffnung trägt.
Leichter wahrlich ist alle Wanderqual,
Leichter als Friedefinden im Heimattal,
Wo in heimischer Freuden und Sorgen Kreis
Nur der Weise sein Glück zu bauen weiß.
Mir ist besser, zu suchen und nie zu finden,
Statt mich eng und warm an das Nahe zu binden,
Denn auch im Glücke kann ich auf Erden
Doch nur ein Gast und niemals ein Bürger werden.

[Hermann Hesse]

Passend zum Thema Reisen und zu mir ...
8.11.07 21:31

gone + come back

Here I am again. Today was kinda shitty. I´m sick, I hurt all over, the toilet is my best friend ... XD And I have an urge to write something. Hooray for the human need for self pity. XD Yeah, it´s lame and pathetic. But it´s good. XD Still it´s funny why ppl talk more about the bad stuff than the good. But hey, who´d sit here updating a journal if there was something fun to do? Eh? See ... XD

Anyway ...

As you might have read on DA I´ve been to Turkey one week!

This came as a big surprise. My Mom won a trip for 2. WON! Oh my ... I never though these thing actually happen. But it did. oO My Dad can´t fly anymore, so I went with her (and felt and still feel guilty, although it´s not my fault). Ah, I so love being *on the road* ... I feel so much more alive! Like I can leave my stoopid life, my crazy mind, thoughts, problems behind ... at least for the time traveling ... and enjoy life, like one should. ;_;

Turkey was awesome! We had such luck. The weather was extremely good for the end of October, sunny most of the time, perfect beach weather! :D OK, I´m not so much a beach person, with my sensitive skin and such. Mom and I spend our holidays mostly sight-seeing. I wanna see where I am! I wanna experience stuff, get to know the area, the ppl, the history! Enough time for swimming afterwards ... ^^
We had such a great guide. Attila. Loved him, really. Had so much fun with him and learned a lot. I´m really grateful we got him ...

These days truly seemed unreal, like a dream ... so different ... I can´t believe how lucky I am sometimes. Do I deserve it? ._.

Anyway, the week went by way too fast. Like it always is with good things ... *sigh* And then ... you come back to reality. It can blow you away ... me for sure. x_X It´s not only the shitty cold, wet, grey, dull weather - yeah, I hate the fucking November weather, I would lie if I´d say otherwise - it´s my whole situation ... When I came back it hit me with full force again. No job anymore. Dependence. And the need to do something ... which brings back the pressure. Which brings back the stress, the fear, the panics ... the depression. x_X After the clinic I really though I made a big step away from it. But ... yesterday was a blow. God, I felt so shitty and pathetic again. A wreck. And then I think again ... am I strong enough to change? Strong enough to start something new. To TRY? And I don´t have the answer, because I don´t have confidence. *sigh* I wish I could be truly hopeful and confident ... Hello self pity, here we go again. XD Actually it´s just pure fucking desperation ... thank god there´s galgenhumor. And ignorance. ^^

Sorry for bothering you with my shitty day thoughts. ^^
8.11.07 21:29

stuff I watch

yeah, I´m kinda a tv series junkie ... and don´t care

stuff I tend to watch regularly:

House MD

Who doesn´t know him ...

"From executive producers Paul Attanasio, Katie Jacobs, David Shore, and Bryan Singer comes a new take on mystery, where the villain is a medical malady and the hero is an irreverent, controversial doctor who trusts no one, least of all his patients.
Dr. Gregory House (Hugh Laurie) is devoid of bedside manner and wouldn't even talk to his patients if he could get away with it. Dealing with his own constant physical pain, he uses a cane that seems to punctuate his acerbic, brutally honest demeanor. While his behavior can border on antisocial, House is a maverick physician whose unconventional thinking and flawless instincts have afforded him a great deal of respect. An infectious disease specialist, he's a brilliant diagnostician who loves the challenges of the medical puzzles he must solve in order to save lives."


2nd season started, I hope they can keep up a good story ...

"Heroes is a serial saga about people all over the world discovering that they have superpowers and trying to deal with how this change affects their lives. [...] As the viewing audience is discovering the nature of each hero's powers, the heroes themselves are discovering what having superpowers means to them as well as the larger picture of where their superpowers come from. Tune in each week to see how these heroes are drawn together by their common interest of evading the series' antagonist who wants to harvest their super-DNA for himself. Their ultimate destiny is nothing less than saving the world!"


Same as Heroes - I wait how the 2nd season will develop.

"Based on Jeff Lindsay's novels Darkly Dreaming Dexter and Dearly Devoted Dexter this crime thriller follows Dexter Morgan. Dexter is a forensic blood spatter expert for the Miami Dade Police Department. He is the main support for his sister. He has a steady girlfriend, with two kids who adore him. He also has an active "night life". Based on a code instilled in him by his foster father, Harry, he hunts down people who have escaped justice and makes sure they don't get away with a crime again."

another one I watch with a passion but which pauses atm ...


"Oceanic Flight 815 out of Sydney, Australia is mysteriously brought down out of the sky, crashing on an uncharted island somewhere in the Pacific Ocean. The survivors quickly learn they must band together in order to have any hope of rescue, because the island is treacherous and holds many secrets. As they are about to learn, the survivors have secrets of their own ..."

Other stuff I can recomment to at least take a look at: Skins, NCIS, and my newest discovery: pushing daisies. There´s much more good stuff out there, too, but it´s getting out of hand. ^^

Anyway, if there´s some stuff out there you think I could definitely like ... bring it on! :D
12.10.07 08:43


Wheeee, my beloved Radiohead released their new album. In rainbows. Aaaaand ... you can download it online! Ain´t that great? Check out this link.

Listened to it for a few times now, and I like it! Typical Radiohead stuff ... YAY

Oh, and since I am drooling already ... check out the Sweeney Todd trailer! Imagine ... Tim Burton, Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter, Alan Rickman! Oh yeah, and Borat and Wormtail are in there, too. Dunno about you, but this mixture gets me pretty excited. ^^
12.10.07 08:22

back for good?

Hello there, I´m back home. Or am I? My mind isn´t, yet, that´s how it feels to me. I feel a bit like Hape Kerkeling during the last days of his walk on the Camino - can recomment his book about it, btw. I also left my home to go on a journey, kinda, and it lead me to things and people I didn´t expect ...

Don´t wanna talk much about what happened in the clinic, much is private and better kept to myself, but I can say that these last weeks did help. I got out of a hole I was afraid I´d stay in forever. I took some steps! Tiny, almost unnoticable for others probably, but huge for me ...

blabla, enough babbling just wanted to say I feel better ^^

Important: House and Heroes started again!!! YAY And I loooove the new episodes. I´m excited as hell. Guess I can´t leave the web for good after all ...
5.10.07 17:38

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